Kick My Ass

Well I walked up to the bar
I laid down my platinum card
Then I ordered fifty longnecks
For my new friends (Thanks Kenny)
Well the barmaid passed them out
And before we chugged them down
I held mine up, said, "Here's to us" and then

This blonde slid up to me
She said, that was awful sweet
And then I saw her boyfriend
As wide as he was tall
Well he broke up our hug
With a six-foot-five inch shove
And I found myself
Slammed up against the wall

Why does everybody want to kick my ass
I'm just trying to have a little fun
For all the ones who can't
And just because I kiss the prettiest girls
And I drive my truck too fast
Why does everybody want to kick my ass

Well I never been the type
To walk up and pick a fight
I've always been the kind to get along
I throw parties all the time
And they're always on my dime
We drink and dance and smoke until the dawn

Well my style of stress relief
Sometimes disturbs the peace
The police show up
Cut donuts in my yard
And while the Zeppelin's playin' loud
They run off my party crowd
They cuff my wrists
And throw me down so hard

Why does everybody want to kick my ass
I'm just trying to have a little fun
For all the ones who can't
And just because i kiss the prettiest girls
And I drive my truck too fast
Why does everybody want to kick my ass

And just because I kiss the prettiest girls
And I drive my truck too fast
Why does everybody want
It seems like everybody wants
Why does everybody want to kick my ass