Gaston - Reprise

"Help! Someone help me!"
"Maurice?"
"Please! Please! I need your help!
He's got her, he's got her locked in the dungeon!"
"Who?"
"Belle! We must go! Not-not a minute to lose!"
"Whoa! Slow down Maurice! Who's got Belle locked in a dungeon?"
"A Beast! A horrible, monstrous Beast!"
"Hehehehe"
"Is it a big Beast?"
"Huge!"
"With a long, ugly snout?"
"Hideously ugly!"
"And sharp, cruel fangs?"
"Yes, yes! Will you help me?"
"All right, old man. We'll help you out."
"You will? Oh, thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"
"Crazy old Maurice!"
"Hehe. He's always good for a laugh."
"Crazy old Maurice, hmmm?
Crazy old Maurice, hmmm"

LeFou, I'm afraid I've been thinking
A dangerous pastime
I know
But that whacky old coot is Belle's father
And his sanity's only so-so

Now the wheels in my head have been turning
Since I looked at that loony, old man
See, I've promised myself I'd be married to Belle
And right now I'm evolving a plan

"If I..."
"Yes? Then we..."
"No! Would she?"
"Guess! Now I get it!"
"Let's go!"

No one
Plots like Gaston
Takes cheap shots like Gaston
Plans to persecute harmless crackpots like Gaston
So his marriage we soon'll be celebrating
My what a guy
Gaston!